Update on Vladimir/Anton

[spies7anton]

As all of you should know, I found love in Spies 7. Love in the form of an overweight, but WELL PROPORTIONED, evil demon clown spy. Lots of people didn't know what to make of our connection, some even went as far as to question my sexuality, but we all know the saying "you can't help who you love."

I endured plenty of heartbreak during the course of our tragic relationship. Having my man marry a pasty ginger bitch, only because I hadn't been blessed with a pair of ovaries, thwarting any hopes that the clown had of expanding his clown army. Praying daily that a pair of working ovaries with assembly instructions would be magically delivered to my doorstep. And of course, after getting over the denial stage, dealing with the fact that I had been fucked in a rucksack by my knight in shining facepaint.

To relive our relationship in video form: www.xtranormal.com/watch/6409399/

The relive our relationship through my eyes:
spies7.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=epseven&action=display&thread=3702

Anywho... since then, there's been plenty of shovel action going on. Gay? Try getting hit in the head with a shovel and laughing about it while feeling pleasure. Gay, my ass. Just a lot of bro'ing out, kicking it with the bro's, listening to Jack Johnson, maybe play some X-Box. We do things men do... we like to shit with the door open, we talk about pussy, we like to go on riverboat gambling trips, we make our own beef jerky. That's what we do.

We also go through struggles just like any other pair out there. Due to his strategic marriage of Cassidy, we've had trouble expanding our clan of clown. Despite our efforts, unfit mother Cassidy has custody of all of the children. She unfortunately has leverage because of his past as a spy. Due to the alimony he has to pay to her, his non-descript white van is no longer insured and it doesn't quite have the appeal it once had. He's also had to take up a part-time job as a dope dealer to support our out-of-control motherlanding habit.

If anyone knows a good lawyer, contact me. If anyone wants to kill Cassidy for free, contact me. I would do it myself, but my trigger finger was injured in a jazzercising accident.

Shout-out to Kirsten.

xoxo Anton.

[spies6roxy]

Aug 8, 2010 16:35:01 GMT -6 spies7anton said:

Anywho... since then, there's been plenty of shovel action going on. Gay?

Yes.

[spies7anton]

Roxy, you have been invited to the Playa Hataz Ball. You're up for an award.

You could use a good motherlanding.

[spies6roxy]

Um. Ew.

[spies5leticia]

I hadn't been blessed with a pair of ovaries

*snort*

[spies1Monica]

thwarting any hopes that the clown had of expanding his clown army.

This is definitely a good thing.

[spies7joshua]

ur still a dutchbag i hop u get sooed and cassdy kicks ur ass

[Judge Sam]

hahaha this is hilarious, i wonder if cassidy will come in here to voice her side of the custody dispute?

[The Yurinator]

Anton my old pal, I am glad to know you are still alive. I thought you were dead!

[spies7queencassidy]

Anton. Buddy. Pal. I don't have ovaries either; all you need is a little magic And yes, all the kids are going great especially Sorinidy and Cassimir, and the alimony is ROLLING in, what with me getting shares in ALL of Vladimir's lairs and shell companies and white van factories. Anton, I do wish to be friends with you, but poison testing all my food when you're around means I'm running out of the cats I adopted from Hank and Kathie.

[spies7anton]

Get me a pair of ovaries and then we'll talk.

[spies7vladimir]

It's been a rough number of months. Thanks to all of you who have kept me in your thoughts during these times. As you may know if you follow my twitter feed @impalesincomparison the government has taxed roughly 40% of my income generated from selling straight dope (heroin, naturally) as well as my kidney stealing enterprises. While I've made up some of the lost profits by refining my kidney stealing methods (drink, rufie, van, kidney, purified in the waters of lake Minnetonka) and diluting my heroin, it's still been tough to generate enough income.

What I really need at this point is to motherland Yuri once more for old times' sake, do a bit of jazzercise to clear the mind, and then get back to work at expanding my clown army. Impregnating many women in my nondescript white van can be surprisingly more difficult than you may be led to believe, and the results are not always optimal. My son Kleyton is a shining example of results that have to unfortunately be cast aside.

If you'll excuse me, Anton has just brought home another Jack Johnson CD, and I'm revving up the game-cube as we speak. Time to get some axe body spray, take off my pants, and just bro-out and chill with the bros.

-The Impaller

[Judge Sam]

FUCK I love Spies hahahahaha. this forum is so unbelievably hilarious. That's the number one thing I loved about spies: the characters. So fucking funny. So many amazing, interesting, enthralling, unique, dedicated characters. And when you put a bunch of those characters together the relationships they have with each other is even more fascinating. Personally I think the whole mafia setup is essentially just one big horse and pony show over a cast of interesting, creative characters creating a real life soap opera. i'll never forget the standout characters here.

everyone has their own favorite characters and moments but my standouts are all here: spies7.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=viewarea1090&action=display&thread=4869&page=1

looking back at that brought back so much memories. I think the most important thing with any character is having heart. Just the heart and energy for the game and putting your whole self into it and not holding back, good or bad, just being real. I think all those characters did that and their unique, entertaining personalities shown bright and clear. I love all of them and all of you!